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Killing your heart.

It is the action of faking yourself to make you not feel anything, to make you think that’s how things are, that that’s how it has ended up in.

But your heart follows your flesh as long as you are an animal with a will.

Even if you try to act in a way that rejects all pain, you will eventually mess up somewhere.

The standing of me was born so that my heart wouldn’t be hurt from the guilt. But as long as the memories are shared, there’s a limit to how mitigated it will be.

There’s no way a civilian would be able to endure medieval torture even if they try to act abnormal.

“Fuuh… Fuuh…”

It was a mistake to try to lie down while waiting for Ilias and the others to come.

The memories of me that I was unconsciously trying to push down encroached their way mercilessly into my dreams.

I deliberately put me in a high state to disconnect myself from the torture of Zuccho.

If possible, I wanted to cut off my me self just like that, and make it so that I forgot about it. The actual experience of torture is not something that can be mentally shouldered even by me.

But considering the current situation, the reality is that these kinds of enemies are rough for me.

I would have needed the cooperation of me even if it meant splitting the burden.

“…It is about time.”

I moved my gaze to Chisante, who was convulsing by my side, and threw the tablecloth onto his warped face.

Looking at something like that would only have negative effects on me.

There’s a mechanism to this door, and the only ones who can open it are the close aides of Chisante.

I might be able to open it if I were to comprehend the thoughts of the one who made the door, but I have way too little knowledge of the artisans in Serende, so it would be hard to pull off a Comprehension.

Most of all, I don’t think I would be able to concentrate properly due to the paralyzing poison I drank together with Chisante.

We used a slow acting poison that shows symptoms but has no killing power in the breakfast of Chisante. Both bottles I brought are paralyzing poisons that take away the freedom of the body and take immediate effect.

If there wasn’t one that’s odorless and tasteless in the poisons that Mix uses to incapacitate her enemies, I would have had no choice but to use the original contents of the bottle, so it was lucky for this man.

The door opened with strength and a subordinate of Chisante showed up together with Ilias and Ekdoik.

I explained to Ilias and the others beforehand, so they are making uneasy faces, but I can’t see surprise.

I made it so that Ilias and the others would rush in when the time comes.

The subordinate of Chisante wouldn’t let them pass at first, but of course they would feel uneasy when there’s no reaction after several hours.

“C-Chisante-sama?! Y-You bastard! What did you do to Chisante-sama—”

“It is amusing how you guys are fuming when you knew what Chisante wanted to do to me. I don’t mind you putting the blame on me, but how do you plan on publicizing this? A man that doesn’t even have the strength of a toddler forcefully fed poison to him? He drank it himself despite understanding that it was someone who he knew was going to pull something? Pick your poison.”

“!”

I drink the antidote that Ekdoik gave me.

It softens the effects, so it is not like I will be able to move immediately, but there’s no need to worry about the symptoms of the paralyzing poison getting worse.

“He admitted his sins himself and drank the poison by his own will. Fortunately, the poison he drank wasn’t the kind that takes his life contrary to what he thought. How about this beautified tale instead?”

“H-How dare you be so brazen…!”

“I think you should be treating that man quickly instead of trying to bite someone. Unfortunately, it seems like I am out of antidote with the one I drank just now. It is not lethal, but if you leave him be for too long, he might end up with irreparable damage.”

“R-Right! Carry Chisante-sama at once!”

I watch as they carry off Chisante while I borrow the shoulder of Ekdoik.

They normally would try to capture me, but they can’t get violent when there are less people available and Ilias and Ekdoik are present to prevent assassinations.

“…You didn’t take his life.” (Ilias)

“Those types of people won’t regret what they did by simply killing them. You have to take away their pride and authority, and drop their life to the pits of hell for the rest of their lives with your own hands.”

Chisante and Yumis both have issues as people, but they have secured routes for human trafficking and drug smuggling in this era, so their sense when it comes to money and political power is top notch.

However, it goes without question that I can crush Yumis after the nobles that cooperated with her have betrayed her, and also pretty much crush the drug circulation of Chisante in the time it can’t move.

All of their backing will have their operations paralyzed with this time’s conflict.

“…Who was the first one to drink the poison?” (Ilias)

“Chisante.”

“Then, there was no need for you to drink it.” (Ilias)

“There was no need to drink it if it were simply to kill him. But we are letting him live here, so there was the need to drink it in front of his eyes. This is a poison that only I can have him drink after all.”

The reason why I purposely drank the poison in front of Chisante despite telling him that both were poison was in order to inject the poison that is me.

He was dealt a heavy blow in this time’s conflict by me. But there would be no point if this just fanned his desire for revenge.

That’s where I need to instill a strong impression on him with a method beyond logic.

Chisante thought he was seriously going to die there, and now whenever he thinks of me, he will be remembering that scene.

A lunatic that would drink poison without hesitation if it is to corner him.

Even if he were to win, he would still be the one to come out losing.

It was a play of madness to burn this into his mind.

“I won’t comment on it any further if you say it was necessary, but…it really doesn’t feel good. It is also vexing that I simply tagged along.” (Ilias)

Being defenseless is a trap to lower the caution of the enemy.

This weak body is useful in order to invite carelessness from Chisante and the others just like how he made the wrong decision just because Ilias and the others were not present.

I am fully aware that this would be a burden for her and the others, but if I don’t take risks of this degree, we would continue creating openings for the ones in power.

“Those feelings alone are already a saving for me.”

This is not a lie.

This is a tightrope walk that was made possible because Ilias and the others were nearby.

If I had been completely alone, the methods I could have used to corner Chisante while leaving him alive would have been extremely limited.

It would have made killing him with poison in the breakfast as the best plan.

“Comrade, it is good that you managed to pin down Yumis and Chisante, but what do you plan on doing now?” (Ekdoik)

“The nation will have to investigate now that the charges have come up. The only one that can be left with the investigation is Washekt, so I will take advantage of this and investigate whether they cooperated with Raheight and his group.”

“Won’t Nuphsa move if it is a domestic problem?” (Ekdoik)

“Nuphsa is busy dealing with the nobles of the Yumis faction. It will flow to Washekt who is free.”

After that, the investigation of the surroundings of Yumis and Chisante began under the command of Washekt as predicted.

Both are in a state where they can’t move properly, and their subordinates couldn’t completely conceal the human trafficking and drug smuggling.

Their secrets were being uncovered one after the other, and the thing I was searching for finally showed up.

It was a tool that was hidden in the dwelling of Chisante.

◇◇

I can hear someone singing.

It is a children’s song that Washekt-sama taught Hilmera-sama.

Hilmera-sama would reminisce her memories with Washekt-sama almost every day.

“You are in a good mood, Hilmera-sama.” (Murshto)

“Obviously! Who would have thought Envoy-sama would bring out results of this degree? There’s no way I wouldn’t be happy!” (Hilmera)

“That’s great to hear. I am also doing pretty well here.” (Murshto)

My work got pretty easy thanks to him cornering the siblings.

The pawns of the people that were hiding began to move desperately in order to extinguish the fire.

Their strength as pawns may be high, but if there’s no one to move the pieces, the board gets messed up easily.

Chisante and Yumis were arrogant, but their ability to avoid danger was outstanding.

Now that the two of them can’t move properly, they were getting caught in the traps of Hilmera-sama to an amusing degree.

I can kill the ones I encounter by just moving as ordered, so it is pretty relaxing for me because I don’t have to think anything unnecessary.

“That’s fine and all, but go get rid of that smell of blood. It is as if you haven’t taken a bath for days.” (Hilmera)

“I took a bath just now. If you are going to complain, can I request for a brand new armor and sword?” (Murshto)

I take off my sword with scabbard and all, and give it to Hilmera-sama.

Looks like she understood why I am so dissatisfied after unsheathing the sword.

“Uwaah, it is completely sticky with blood. It is also chipped terribly. I gave you this sword not too long ago though?” (Hilmera)

“It is not like they were all people who got killed without resistance. There were also skilled ones, so it was unavoidable.” (Murshto)

I have also washed the armor with water, but there’s clumps of blood in the cracks that are clinging on and I can’t wash.

That’s why I can’t get the smell of blood off me, but it also feels stupid to wash it seriously when I am going around killing people every day.

“Can’t you make it so you don’t get splashed by their blood?” (Hilmera)

“I am unfortunately dealing with enemies that shed blood and tears.” (Murshto)

“I don’t like how you put it, insinuating they have hearts. Fine, I will arrange for armor at once.” (Hilmera)

“I think it is about time to change the sword too though.” (Murshto)

“You can just take a sword from my treasury. I have to reward you every now and then.” (Hilmera)

I felt a bit better after hearing that.

The treasury of Hilmera-sama is mostly comprised of articles with memories of Washekt-sama, but there’s also treasures that were left by the parents of Hilmera-sama.

I remember there being swords that even a half-baked swordsman like me would be enthralled by.

“But is that okay? They are mementos of your parents, right?” (Murshto)

“It would be a lie if I said I had no lingering feelings, but the sword would be happier if it were used by you. You are my knight, so accept at least that much of an honor.” (Hilmera)

“I will indulge in the offer, but using it with care is a different story.” (Murshto)

“At least maintain it. If I remember correctly, it is a pretty famous sword.” (Hilmera)

I think I used that sword Hilmera-sama is holding with great care though… Oh well.

It should be sturdier if it is a famous sword. It will probably last long.

“And so, who should I be killing next?” (Murshto)

“About that, it is enough. The pawns and backings of Chisante and Yumis are pretty much in shambles. If I move any further, Nuphsa might get involved. He used Washekt-oniisama to quiet me down, you know? Just what manner of thought crossed his mind to utilize Onii-sama?” (Hilmera)

She says Prince Chisante and Princess Yumis are the ones that are trash as people, but this princess is troublesome in that she considers Prince Nuphsa as more unforgivable for trying to use Washekt-sama.

Well, the reason is clear.

The one who broke the heart of Washekt-sama was Prince Nuphsa, so you could say it is natural.

“But the real reason is…?” (Murshto)

“I want to kill Nuphsa, but I am fine forgiving him since he created an excuse to meet Onii-sama.” (Hilmera)

“It is good that you are honest. And so, you have been told to stay put by Washekt-sama, so you are going to do as told?” (Murshto)

“Yes. The board is already set. You could say my objective has already been fulfilled.” (Hilmera)

Hilmera opened the door with a hum.

The room of Hilmera is truly good as a place to see the cityscape of Serende.

It is to a point where I would like to invite him if Hilmera-sama wasn’t here.

“What was your objective…?” (Murshto)

“Don’t make me repeat myself so much. It is obviously to make Washekt-oniisama the king of Serende.” (Hilmera)

“His Majesty is still in the throne.” (Murshto)

“No issue.” (Hilmera)

“Don’t tell me…” (Murshto)

It is scary that this princess might do it.

They are not blood related, so she really might do it without hesitation.

“That’s not it. Father was planning on choosing the next king in a not so far future. The influence of the other siblings has shifted greatly with this incident, so his decision should have solidified faster than planned.” (Hilmera)

“Really?” (Murshto)

“Yes, that’s why Chisante and Yumis were taking extreme measures to pin down Envoy-sama.” (Hilmera)

That’s impressive.

So His Majesty made Washekt-sama make contact with him because he wanted the last pieces to judge who will be inheriting the throne…

That’s why the other siblings showed up to him, judged him as a threat, and displayed hostility…

To think he would use the benefactor that protected the peace of the nation. What a horrible nation right from the top.

“But that means Prince Nuphsa still has influence.” (Murshto)

“No issues there. I have already made my move there.” (Hilmera)

“Eh, when…? Even though you only looked like you were having fun with Washekt-sama when you were sick.” (Murshto)

“Lately, yeah. But the poison I planted was taking root way back. That’s why Father will definitely choose Washekt-oniisama as the king.” (Hilmera)

Hilmera-sama seems to be pretty confident.

But will that Prince Nuphsa get caught in her trap so easily?

If we see things without favoritism, the one who is the most skilled within the siblings is Prince Nuphsa.

That prince alone was the only one who looked at me as a dangerous individual.

He must be skilled in understanding the insides of someone like that man.

But Prince Nuphsa doesn’t have the allure that that man has.I don’t feel any frailty in the shape of his heart at all.

He is steady and the components shaping his self form a powerful rampart.

I personally thought for sure Prince Nuphsa would be the biggest obstacle, but…as long as Hilmera-sama says it is fine, I have no choice but to leave the responsibility to her.

“Then, what should I do? I want to see how that man is doing already though.” (Murshto)

“I don’t mind. The objective of Envoy-sama will be fulfilled once he finds the proof in the place of Chisante. He might even return to Taizu just like that.” (Hilmera)

“Aah, I see… If his objective is fulfilled…there would be no reason for him to stay in Serende…” (Murshto)

When that happens, I won’t be able to see the shape of his heart when I want to.

That would be really sad. I feel like I would cry just from imagining it.

“…My role as a princess will be over soon. You don’t need to stay my knight when that happens. If you want to chase after him, you can do so.” (Hilmera)

“I honestly thought about it, but is that really something for you to be saying?” (Murshto)

“I have been helped plenty by how dutiful you are. I want you to be honest with your own heart.” (Hilmera)

“…But wouldn’t you feel like crying if you were told that straight to your face?” (Murshto)

“Maintain appearances with me.” (Hilmera)

I can chase after him and continue watching his path.

That’s a really appealing future, and I would like that.

But I have a feeling that wouldn’t go well.

There has never been an instance where such a hesitant conscience has been wrong in the past.

I am sure it won’t be fulfilled. There will be a future sadder than any I can imagine waiting for me there.

And yet, why is it that my heart is more excited than ever before?

Just what development am I wishing for?

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